Casa Rosales

Casa Rosales

Sunday 6 January 2013

Over one shoulder



I've said many times that I'm not the reflective sort. Yet blogging encourages one to reflect. Sitting down in front of the computer, reading what others have written, noticing with absolute amazement that I have had more than 50,000 visits since I started out and looking forward to a new year, another new year here in Spain and, at the moment, in glorious sunshine and under exquisite blue skies, I feel a quick glance back might not be a bad thing to do.



The first thing that I feel compelled to acknowledge is that for the past few months, we've been in negotiations for a property. Nothing is settled yet. I've resisted writing about it partly because I'm trying very hard to keep it from being a blot on the landscape if we don't get it. If I only see it vaguely from the corner of my eye, then I can cope with it disappearing. And it's always so important to see what is right in front of you.

The other reason for not writing about it has been that the house is not in Alcala la Real. It's on the other side of Granada.
I had not wanted to see it and viewed it very critically when FR insisted it was worth having a look. And despite my negative approach, it worked its way into my heart. We took the children to see it and they were surprisingly very enthusiastic even though we explained it would necessitate a change of schools if we were able to get it. They didn't seem to mind at all, which surprised me; I know that if they'd said 'no way', then we'd have gone no further.
As it is, our offer is going backwards and forwards; we know our limit and cannot go beyond that. So I continue to hold it as a shadowy idea in the corner of my mind's eye. (But I know just what will go in that little nook next to the kitchen door, of course....)
You may, if you will, cross a couple of fingers! It has wisteria too.

I feel I have developed as a language teacher this year, particularly from October when I took on some extra hours and more responsibility at the Academy. I knew I loved language and words but that love is now something I so enjoy transmitting to my students. I enjoy the Spanish/English connections and finding the differences and similarities. Many of my students also like to have 'hooks' to hang their understanding on and it's great fun finding out what works for whom. I'm very grateful to Kirklees Council for the emphasis they always placed on training for employees - much of which helped to develop my own skills and knowledge but which also instilled an understanding of how training works. Helped having a really good friend who is a really good trainer too!

My children have grown tremendously this year - not just in height and age, but beginning to turn into rounded young people.
It hasn't been easy for Mateo and he knows he has to buckle down and address those areas of academic work that he has held at arm's length in his new school. In addition to growing and changing radically in the past twelve months, he's gained in confidence and shows many glimpses of the mature person he is becoming.
Ruy is most anxious to follow in his footsteps and is filling out in preparation for a growing spurt. He really hopes this will come soon as his sister is only a hair's breadth or so less than him in height. Ruy can put so much effort in and at the Christmas performances, he absolutely shone with pleasure and enjoyment as his class sang. Quick to anger and very stubborn at times, he's also the most delightful son to have - cheerful, responsive, responsible and fun - and he flourishing in the Spanish sunshine.
My delightful, clever and funny daughter..is delightful, clever and funny! She loves to entertain, works hard at school, is thoughtful, independent and original. Her drawings are quite amazing - she creates cartoon sequences that tell her stories brilliantly and I am constantly fascinated by and proud of her.

And in reflective mood, I'm so happy to say that FR and I are still very much in love. We are quite a volatile and argumentative couple and our ups are as high as our downs are deep. We haven't reached a stage where we are comfortable companions - maybe we won't - but we are not bored with each other, can still make each other laugh - and cry - and are looking forward to another exciting year together.

Looking back I am amazed, as we so often are, as to how quickly the year has passed. For many in the UK it seems to have been a year of celebration as well as downpour. I saw little of the Golden Jubilee here and not that much more of the Olympics - partly because we were away on holiday and partly because the coverage in Spain concentrated on favourite Spanish sports such as basketball, football and synchronised swimming...so the summer months focused on seeing family for us. It was great to catch up with my sister again albeit briefly. And we were all grateful to be able to be with FR's grandfather for the last time too and, if an old man has to die, then his timing was perfect, allowing us all to get together to celebrate his life with the least possible undue fuss and the greatest affection.

A moment that stands out for me is when, in April, we painted our toes in rainbow colours to offer support across the world when a fellow blogger was diagnosed with cancer. She is doing well and her blog is an absolute delight - she's Annie at Artistica Domestica. Good on you, Annie - you're doing great!

Then, more recently, a diagnosis was made on a friend closer to home - someone I have known for more than 20 years but with whom I have only recently come to view as a real friend. It is always shocking news to hear.

Janice in Caunes and I worked together for the same council and I always appreciated her intelligence and knowledge of the Education Service; her strong views, commitment and level-headed approach were things I really admired. I admit to being rather in awe of her. She left the council a couple of years before I did and went to work at her local hospital and I rather lost touch. However, I remember bumping into her in the carpark at Kingsgate in Huddersfield just before we upped and offed to Spain and thinking again how easy it was to talk to her and how genuine, friendly and approachable she was. It was that chance meeting that kept us in touch via Facebook and then my blog. Janice took to blogging like a duck to water once she decided to do it and those of us who follow her know that she is full of wonderful stories and anecdotes about her family, past and present, and her insights into life in France. She has a tough few months ahead of her as she faces chemotherapy but when I saw her at Christmas, she looked wonderful and I don't think cancer has a chance in the face of her strength and optimism. And we are going to spend some time together as soon as she feels up to it. Janice, you are one of the most precious things of 2012 - here's to enjoying more of 2013 together!

Malala
And as my brain kicks in and I really start to think back about 2012 and think more broadly, I realise that there are things that have happened in the world this year that are almost too tragic to bear. The untimely death of children is obviously uppermost in my mind, but also the attacks on and murder of young girls and  women who are doing nothing more than going to school, travelling together or working in humanitarian roles, as teachers and health workers - I find I'm so angry at this that it is painful; it's overwhelmingly frustrating that all efforts so far in the world to counteract this attitude should be as nought at the end of 2012. Outrageous. I am outraged. And will continue to be so and so must we all.

I will be discussing these issues with my students when I return to my teaching and with my own children too. Changing the world is rather too much for me to take on but damn it all, I will make sure that these things don't go unnoticed by those near by me. And maybe we should all look over one shoulder to see what is going on behind our backs or in places we don't feel we belong to - because whilst we don't feel the threat directly, it's much better to be aware of what is happening than burying our heads in the sand or somewhere cosy and comfortable.

We really should be aware.




26 comments:

  1. very thoughtful and observant Annie. Looking odour shoulders is required for reversing and preparing to move forward. Whatever happens re house location as a family you will make it home. Looking forward to your next installment!

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    1. Thanks Helen - glad you're here with me as we keep moving on! Axxx

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  2. For someone who doesn't consider herself to be the 'reflective sort' you've made a super job of reflecting on 2012. It's lovely to read about the growth you witnessed your children experience - always wonderful to be part of. It's also good to read that you are still in love with FR.

    May 2013 be everything you would wish it o be, and more.
    Take care.
    Gaynor x

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    1. Thanks Gaynor - I do try and practice reflection as in all my training courses that covered learning styles, I always came out as such an 'activist' that without effort, I could stubble though life having a great time but learning nothing! So, you see, the training did make an impact. I hope 2013 is good for us all. Much love, Axxx

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  3. Dear dear Annie, following the story of your family's Spanish adventure...which is actually real life, not just a momentary fling, has been so good. I love hearing about Matteo,Ruy and the adorable Romy... FR and of course, Darwin. It is amazing the way you have all adapted to your new life, and I am so pleased that you are happy with your role as a language educator. This reflection on the year is hard to read... I do hope the house works out,I hope the children continue to thrive, I hope your' friend Annie's health improves.... and of course, I hope I can have as much faith in my ability to fight what I am facing as you seem to think I have ! Our friendship has become very important to me, and I thank you for these kind words...and wish you and your beautiful family, real happiness for this coming year. See you soon ! xxxxx

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    1. If it were only my faith in your ability to fight, they wouldn't be able to get another needle in you. I believe in YOUR ability to fight and I also believe that your family and friends will support you 100 percent in that. I'm just glad I'm one of the friends that can add to that support. We will see each other again as soon as possible. Thank you for all your good wishes, Axxx

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  4. A beautiful reflective post Annie. You write so well and your blog is always a joy to read. My fingers are crossed for the house and I hope 2013 proves to be a very happy year for you and your family xx

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    1. Thank you Ayak - you know, it is another thing I was reflecting on - writing and blogging - and how many excellent writers there are out there in the big wide world. Perhaps I'm turning into a reflector after all these years! Whilst I don't want your crossed fingers to turn into an inconvenience to you, I am very grateful for them. Much love to you and yours. Axxx

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  5. Annie, this is a pretty fantastic reflection on 2012 for someone who says she isn't the reflective sort. :-) The way you've captured your feelings as you look back over an eventful year for family and friends and forward to one which may be even more eventful (everything crossed for that house, if it's meant to be) is both touching and hugely life-affirming and I enjoyed it so much.

    I join you in feeling totally outraged that all over the world people, in particular women and children, are suffering because others see them as powerless and somehow inferior - to be used or cast aside at whim! Humanity still has so far to go to recognise the uniqueness and dignity of every individual.

    Wishing you everything you hope for for yourself and your family in 2013. Pxxx

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    1. As ever, Perpetua, I am so grateful for your contribution, your own words and how you reflect back so well just what it is I have tried to say. If the house is meant to be, it will be - and if not, then there's nothing lost and we are really very happy here. We've had a good year and it's such a blessing to start a new one feeling so very positive.

      As for the world's problems - at least I know there are some wonderful people in it despite everything else. In that, I'm very lucky.

      I too wish you everything good for the coming year. Axxx

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  6. Sitting here on a Sunday evening reading your blog was wonderful.Whenever i discover it posted i have to click on and drop everything else.You are compulsive reading Annie.All best wishes for 2013 to you and your family. Mariaxx.

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    1. What a wonderful compliment, Maria - do be careful what you drop, though, won't you! I'm very grateful to everyone who reads and comments and I thank you so much for taking the time to do so. Here's wishing you and Ian a lovely 2013. Axxx

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  7. A lovely moving salute to the passing of time Annie. I'm so glad I joined your blogging circle and I hope one day we can meet up and pass the time of day (and eat chocolate). A message for all of us to count our blessings while we have them.

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    1. There's nothing I'd like better, Annie! To sit and chat and share chocolate in a big bloggy, real-life circle...that's now officially on my wishlist. Maybe not for 2013 but for when my children are old enough for me to have a wander on my own. And I've always fancied Turkey...Best wishes for the new year to you and yours. Axxx

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  8. Dear Annie
    A beautiful thought provoking post and review of your year. I love reading your words - you write so well. I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you hope 2013 brings all you wish for.
    Sophie x

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    1. And I treasure your words, Sophie! Thank you so much for you kind comments. I hope we will share many more in 2013. Axxx

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  9. I understand your frustration, anger and outrage Annie.......it is felt by many.............I hope 2013 brings us all, wherever we are, the courage to cope with whatever life may throw at us........be it personally or globally. x

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    1. We have to appreciate our own good fortune, don't we? And yes, to hope that little by little our outrage will change things for the better. Most of all, without further outrage being committed. Axxx

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  10. For someone not reflective that's a lot of reflecting! And reflecting that is both fascinating and affecting.

    Here's hoping that 2013 beings you all that you wish for, be that for yourself, or for others struggling in this cruel world.

    PS Your comment on my post had me laughing out loud ;)

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    1. Thank you Annie! So glad you laughed...I think I becoming more reflective as time goes on, though I still tend to jump into things feet first...and then have to apply a little reflection afterwards.

      It's great knowing you, Annie! Axxx

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  11. That was a lovely reflection of your world in the past year...I do hope the house works out for you.
    And how right you are to feel the need to be aware of the injustice in the world...and to try to combat it in one's own way wherever possible.
    Sometimes we just feel so helpless in the face of it all but one person helped is one person helped.

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    1. You're quite right, Fly, about one person helped. It's important too not to feel helpless - we can all do something, somehow. Thank you for your kind words - and a very happy new year to you and yours. Axxx

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  12. What a lovely family life you have, I've gone quite teary (glad to hear it's not without a little - ahem - friction, though.)

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    1. Oh Nilly, there's plenty eye-watering friction!! Tut, you make it sound rude - shame on you! Have a wonderful New Year. I think next time I'm back in England I'm going to ask you to show me some of your favourite places. I like where you go! Axxx

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  13. This is a great post, I wish I had your flare for languages, I struggle so much with French! As for cancer I have lost a friend recently, and I have 3 more friends under going treatment, very worrying.
    Thanks so much for your visit. Keep well Diane

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    1. Thank you Diane! I still struggle with Spanish though once I spoke French better than Spanish and now can't remember a word!
      I wish your friends all the best. And to you too! Axxx

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